Jun
1
Okay ladies of Toronto, we get it - you’re edgy.
Can you let that chunk of shaved hair on one side of your head grow back in now?
who raised you?
Do you ever look at a person doing/wearing/promoting something so unimaginably idiotic that you think to yourself, "who raised you to believe that behaviour is acceptable"?
Of course you do, but I bet you're too nice and polite and politically correct to say anything about it.
We're not.
May
24
Just noticed an article online titled, “Themed Weddings to Avoid”.
I didn’t click on it, though, because I assume the body of the article would simply read, “All of them.”
May
21
Convert this.
People who drive convertibles and park them with the top still down are basically saying that they are so rich, they don’t care if their car is stolen. Do you think they are also so rich that they don’t care if their car gets spit in?
If you don’t have access to a kiddy pool,
you aren’t doing summer right. Try harder.
May
16
"Man Marries Pillow"
I can’t really make fun of this (I know - what?!) because of the sheer number of times I’ve wished I could marry my bed. The bed never gets mad when I fall onto it wasted drunk, plus it doesn’t talk back. Right guys? That being said, this is deeply upsetting to me, mostly because of how much thought I’ve put into this article. I have to wonder who agreed married this “couple”? How did she(?) sign her name on the marriage license? Who walked her down the aisle? I have so many questions, and I’m angry that this is taking up valuable space in my brain. Thanks again, internet.
May
12
A Rational, Intelligent Argument
I don’t mind having one. I don’t even mind losing one. I only mind if you don’t know how to make one.
May
11
You probably shouldn’t ask me, “Do you still write a blog?”
because you are immediately revealing that you do not read my blog. And you should be ashamed. I feel sorry for you.
May
8
“Epic. That’s just a fancy word for ‘long’, isn’t it?”
My older (and much funnier) brother
Overheard on Queen St. West
“I just don’t think there is anything more important than being aware of what people are saying about you, especially when you don’t know them personally”
I can think of a lot of things more important than that. Namely, everything.
May
4
Last night I passed a place called “The Toronto Institute for the Enjoyment of Music”.
Well, that certainly sounds like fun.
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